Every March, Miami Beach braces for the Spring Break chaos that tourism brings. By 2023, the party had turned dangerous, with record-breaking crime—including two fatal shootings—pushing the city to its breaking point. It was clear: this toxic relationship had to end.

So, Miami Beach made it official: we broke up with Spring Break. The announcement—served with the classic “It’s not us, it’s you”—went viral, stealing the spotlight until a TikTok situationship stole it back. Because sometimes, the party isn’t worth the hangover.